{a little post to let you know where the h*** i have been }
i've been watching the ice melt under my feet.
(literally.)
i've been eating cookies
 |
| (and cupcakes) |
i've been enjoying the little eccentricities of the city
i've been happy that spring has arrived
i've been indulging my shopping urges
 |
| check out those glasses! |
most of all though, i've been working. a lot.
i've almost gotten so bogged down in the hum-drum no-stop pace of it all that i've forgotten where i've been, why i'm here, where i came from.
sometimes i find myself getting so wrapped up in all of this stuff.
Top 10 Colleges and SAT scores and History papers and test dates,
and all of a sudden it becomes
really easy to just forget who that girl is who is sitting and
holding the pencil (with her left hand, by the way- but more on that later) because i become
so focused on the outcome or the product or the grade.
sometimes its good to get a reminder of who i am. why i'm doing all of this, rather than just going on autopilot with the hope that i can get it all done (w/ flying colors)
and hope that the rest of my life will wait.
well, it wont.
i need to be a person. not just pieces of a person.
not just a test grade, or a vocabulary word.
a person. a whole being. me.
this blog is part of that.
i'm back.
sorry for the absence. i promise i'm here to stay.
it's easy to lose yourself if you don't remind yourself who you are, why you're here.
i've learned that at least.
as for all that SAT junk...now that's a different story.
xo, Rose
have you ever gotten so caught up in something that you've lost yourself?
how did you get 'you' back?
The sun also rises is one of my all time favorite books. The cookies and treats all look really tasty :)
ReplyDeleteMeri
merigoesround.blogspot.com
Cute post girly!
ReplyDeletei feel you. first because i write with my left hand as well. but also because at school (i go to boarding school so it really takes over my life) i feel like i lose myself. at first, i just feel like everyone here doesnt know me. but then i start to wonder....who is me? what is it they dont know? what is most important? and then the whole grades thing, the competition in classes to get the best grade, the stressing and focusing on it.
ReplyDeletemy friend and i have tried to help each other through this by occasionally reminding each other that "this isn't real life" sounds weird but its true. high school is the time when we have our parents, grades,teachers,friends, 'cool' kids, boys etc all judging us and telling us what to do. outside of here, we are more free to be who we are. whoever that is.
so im rambling about my life now. hope this helps you, you definitely help me! i missed you!
thank you for this. i think you're so right. it's so easy to lose ourselves--whoever we are, even if we're not sure yet.
ReplyDeletei know that i went into this school year after a year of figuring out who i was and that i knew before but now i'm not so sure. it's a little confusing.
and boarding school is great but also can be very rough in so many ways. it's very all-encompassing, i get that.
feel free to ramble about your life anytime. i love comments like yours.
<3
r
I'm so glad that you're doing well! :)
ReplyDeleteThose food pics look yummy! Makes me want something sweet, ha
And it's good that you're realizing that grades, activities, ED, etc.. does not define you! You do!
Keep it up :)
<3 Haley
re: i'm back.
ReplyDelete:)
re: how did you get 'you' back?
By not being afraid.
Never apologize for not being here to blog...I'm sure I've said it before but really, true life is far more interesting and important!
ReplyDeleteum, yes, I have definitely been here. so wrapped up in (and depressed about) school, grades, and that big goal of SUCCESS. and as someone whose had the amazing scores and gotten into the right schools, I wish I had taken a few huge steps back and remembered who I was and what it meant to be/have fun. I pushed myself in high school in the hope that there was better stuff to come, and while there IS, that doesn't mean that life should suck ever. Not even for a second. Goals are great, but they shouldn't make you suffer for too long. I'm glad you're coming back to your blog, and doing this for yourself (and only yourself) is a big part of getting 'you' back.
ReplyDeleteI think "getting caught up in something so much that you've lost yourself" can pretty much be the definition of eating disorder in my book... but that's just me :) Sometimes I feel like when there is too much stuff going on, I can't focus on being self-aware and that usually leads to some sort of downward spiral either just in my emotions or all around. Keeping busy and having a good work ethic is important... but no so much to the point where it becomes some sort of weird escape from your own life. Ya know?
ReplyDeleteThose pictures are amazing. You are seriously talented my friend !
Ah those cookies look amazing! Good luck with all the college stuff. Oh, and nothing wrong with glasses. I'm a glasses-wearer as well!!
ReplyDelete-All the best
-Nicole from simply nicole
It's your blog...blog when you wanna!
ReplyDeleteI think you may be the perfect face to rock those glasses.
You said it so well. "You are you". And this blog is all part of it. I love getting a glimpse into your world - the part you choose to share - and live a magical moment of NY with you. Sweet. Real life. Real Rose.
ReplyDeleteI. love. your. blog :) Just putting it out there.
ReplyDeleteHow sweet! Thank you!!!
ReplyDelete