i'm so tired. I think i need to go to the doctor/psychiatrist. My fatigue is getting to be chronic and its annoying, because i wanted to be productive and do work tonight, but all i can think about is sleep!
I was going to post tonight, and i had a ton of pictures for you all, but it took forever (read: at least 20 minutes!) to upload all of them and then i pressed something and they all deleted so now i'm frustrated and just going to go to sleep.
i'll post more tomorrow, i swear.
i don't want to leave ya'll with nothing, because that, i think kind of defeats the purpose of my challenge, to post every day for a week, because i don't think just an excuse really qualifies as a post, so i think i'll share some tidbits of my day with you.
Well, first off, I baked! I baked (or attempted to bake) double chocolate sour-cream muffins. this was a fail for a few reasons:
1) We (my dad and i) forgot to add the water. I just tasted some of my delicious-LOOKING muffins, and they're hard as rocks. the only good part is the top, with the chocolate chips that are still gooey.
2) They're not actually sour-cream. We used 2% greek yogurt instead. Why, oh why did you violate such a cardinal rule of baking (follow the instructions!), you may ask? My dad, it turns out, is a serious fat-phobic, borderline-anorexic, fucking pain-in-the-ass & triggering asshole. That's why. He refused to let me use sour cream. And got mad when I questioned him about it, and told him how unhelpful it was for me that he was afraid of sour cream and was saying how "bad" it was for me. He is such an asshole. No surprise there.
Let's not even go into the fact that i get so triggered by my parents all the time. And they fail to notice. No matter how many times i tell them that it is NOT OKAY to say things about food around me (aka "that was bad" "this is fattening" , "i ate too much today" "let's not use butter" ), they, without fail, always are insensitive dumbasses about it. there's no sugar-coating it.
My dad and I got into a fight while we were baking and it just totally ruined the experience for me. Note to self: bake ALONE. so that you can a: listen to music rather than garrison freaking keiglher and b: HAVE A GOOD TIME and use whatever full-fat ingredients the recipe fucking calls for.
The rest of the day was not as disastrous as the baking was...(thank god!)
I went on a run! With my dad. (this was before the baking disaster). It was actually really nice, and I felt really accomplished (disregard the fact that when asked by my mother how the run was my dad replied that I was "not doing well" because I got a cramp half way though...as if that qualifies as a disaster.) because I actually ran for a good 20 minutes straight without stopping. And even then I think we ran most of the way. Yay!
I also just slept really late and relaxed and had a good time. I needed the rest, I think.
Anyway, sorry for the lack of photos, perhaps i'll post them tomorrow! Hope everyone had a good saturday!
xo
rose
P.S. Do any of you have parents with eating disorders/ disordered eating? and also...Does anybody have any good baking/cooking mishaps they'd like to share, to relieve poor rose of her shame ;) ?
